So I've always wanted to lose a few pounds, nothing new :/ . As far as I can remember I've always been overweight, It may not have been that bad in high school but college has definitely changed many things in my life and my weight is now at an all time high. I have been depending on my summer visits to jamaica to help me slim down because the food I eat in Jamaica is way healthier and organic compared to the processed foods I eat in the US.

I no longer want to depend on my vacations to get back down to a size I never really appreciated in the first place. I want yo move past that and become the small version of myself that I know is in there somewhere.

My excuses usually are that I hate working out and the only "workouts"I would consider doing are dancing and swimming. However, since I am no longer a part of a dance group and I don't like swimming by myself (yea its weird I feel awkward at the pool alone) I've just been avoiding exercise all together.

I started off summer in Jamaica trying to get fit by doing a dance workshop but that has been over for a while now and I'm back on the "no exercise" routine. Not good.

So as of tomorrow I want to push myself to being healthy, I know what it takes, I know the steps to eating right and exercising, so I'm finally going to do it!

Of course I'll have to come up with a plan for workouts and work it into my schedule for when I go back to New York and also for when I go back to college.

Healthy, fit..smaller Alyson--> here I come!

Weight loss

I really didn't make this blog for "health" purposes but I need somewhere to write about random things that will lead to a smaller me. I have been really into good, natural health for a couple of weeks now.

So I have now started to take a teaspoon of black strap molasses in the mornings because molasses is really good for you. You get    iron, calcium, potassium, magnesium, copper and manganese!

Here's a link explaining molasses and its properties--> http://www.natural-health-restored.com/blackstrap-molasses.html

Also: Evidence suggests that an overall improvement in diet and health will be reflected in the appearance of the skin and hair. The rich vitamin and mineral content of blackstrap molasses can improve overall health by providing these nutrients and potentially help with the growth of your hair.

Read more: Blackstrap Molasses & Hair Growth | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/facts_5905054_blackstrap-molasses-hair-growth.html#ixzz1Szfll4Ez

I also went to a mineral spring today, they are supposedly known for therapeutic properties because of the minerals in the water. I don't know two much about this so I won't go on a lot about this.

I've also decided to significant cut down on my dairy intake because of information I found on the trusty old Google result page.
You have to watch the videos below! They are short and its only two of them :)

So today I watched...

…Blue Valentine, with Michelle Williams and Ryan Gosling. This movie just pronounced all the fears I ever imagined for my love life. I really have a huge fear of ending up in a relationship which leads on to marriage and then divorce. I think it would offend my mother if I ever said that I don’t want to end up like her. But thats the truth, I don’t want to be married twice and suffer and cry throughout both marriages. It scares the shit out of me! 

Yes I’m expecting difficulties in my relationships but I don’t want the degree of hardships I see other people go through in their marriages. It makes me wonder if I even want to be married. Do I want to subject myself to the heartache that I witness on a daily basis with my mother and other individuals. No!! I don’t think so!!

There are so many things I wish I could do. They say “you control your destiny”, which to some extent is true but then again these are the same people who tell you to be considerate. You know the “what will others say?”, “what about your family?” questions. Well to be honest, all I want to reply is “who the fuck cares?” I really just want to break free from the status quo. I hate being constricted to the expectations of others for my life. I want to go out and do what I want like a normal 21 year old.


Many of my friends can testify that I lead a different lifestyle than people my age. People my age go out and travel, they do things because they want to, they make decisions for themselves and they fuck who they want to!! I don't get to do all that. I'm not saying I wanna be carefree all the time and be a big time slut, I'm just saying....no screaming, "let me be who the fuck i wanna be". I am so damn tired of being that good girl who conforms! I'm such a conformists, its pathetic. The thing is, I know what to do to follow my own path, but i just don't have the guts. 


I think I need some guidance :/


Better yet maybe a wake up call!

New Thing!

So I always wanted a personal blog.. I have a blogspot for my hair and a tumblr for just random shit but I didn’t feel right doing certain stuff on it. Like saying what I pleased, because too many people that I know about them. My hair blog caters to a certain audience who come there only to hear about my journey to long hair, while my other tumblr is just really cluttered with junk.

I want this one to be a real reflection of every aspect of me, no borderlines here. Not here for follower count, just a bare representation of me and my interests.